Hello, my name is techgirl. My day job is writing about business and technology for one of India’s leading media houses. You might find it very hard to believe that sometimes I cannot write what is really happening in the Indian tech world. My Editor is ‘close friends’ with half the tech moguls in India. Our advertising department is even closer to these tech companies. So, we write only positive feel good stories about the Indian IT, BPO and KPO sectors. My Chief Reporter is a true believer who tells me that it is ‘disloyal’ to India to publish anything negative about India. Ms Chief Reporter feels that the sexual harassment case against Infosys was a conspiracy by America’s Silicon Valley to prevent more jobs outsourced to the best and brightest in Bangalore.
Sadly, this has resulted in senior managers and my close friends in TCS, Infosys, Genpact, Satyam etc not given a chance to tell Indians what they really feel. These CEO’s ring me at night and pour their heart out. I will use this blog to tell Indians what their bosses really feel. Sometimes, I am half asleep am not sure what they really want to say. But as an Indian journalist that has never stopped me giving the facts from my sleepy recollection of events.
I am still looking for sponsors. Trashgoss (aka Techgoss) has just bought my blog and will pay me to write satire. Suckers! After working in the tech media for many years, I am open to any sponsorship ‘opportunities’.
The phone rang at 10 am in the morning. Early in the morning or night means it could only be Sudhir Agarwal from Aegis BPO. Sudhir is a real nice guy. He does Puja at 10 pm and then goes to bed. Up at 5 am and starts the day with an hour long Puja.
This ring tone was that I had selected for Sudhir.
“Om Namoo Shiva ..”
As readers of my blog will know, Sudhir Agarwal has the moral DNA and values of Narayana Murthy and the calm temperament of Sachin Tendulkar. In the Aegis offices, he is known as the ‘Peace maker’ – a man who never loses his temper and is a calming, soothing influence on junior staff. Some swear, they have seen a halo around his head. One Team Leader tells friends that Sudhir told her that he shuns money and power and given a choice would rather serve the poor and homeless in California.
So, why was Sudhir calling me at 10 am?
Sudhir Agarwal: Namaste, Sister Techgirl.
Techgirl: Good late morning. What’s up Sudhir? Nice of you to call me at 10 am. You usually only call early in the morning or early in the night. 10 am is when I am sensible enough to make out the difference between BJP and RSS. And please don’t call me Sister.
Sudhir Agarwal: Okay sister. Will stop calling you sister. I just have this sweet habit of calling most women sisters. I called you at 10am because I cannot discuss this topic in the pure hours of early morning.
Techgirl: What topic?
Sudhir Agarwal: Yesterday, I was getting a hair cut at my salon when I noticed this dirty, filthy picture. That’s why I hate to go the hair cutting saloon. They have all these filthy magazines. This one had a picture of President Obama looking at the ass of this young Brazilian woman. It was disgusting.
Techgirl: Why? I thought all of you men were the same. Most men would sneak a quick peek of such a curvaceous young woman.
Sudhir Agarwal: Sister, Techgirl. Stop. For heaven’s sake, stop. I don’t know what kind of men you meet, but every man in Aegis knows how to behave himself. No man in Aegis will every do such a thing. I have personally selected good, honourable men and they have done the same. So, the whole chain is very ‘women friendly’.
Techgirl: I am sorry, Sudhir. I do know you are a very nice man.
Sudhir Agarwal: I forgive you, Sister Techgirl. But always remember, all men are not the same. Aegis has men with the moral qualities of Manmohan, Shah Rukh and Pramod Bhasin.
Techgirl: So, what was your reaction when you saw Obama checking out the girl?
Sudhir Agarwal: Techgirl, if only I could right a wrong. If I was there at the conference, I would have ignored all the security guards and rushed to President Obama. I would have then held him by his shoulders and screamed at him:
“
You disgust me Obama. You really do.
You should be concentrating on getting your country out of its recession, than checking out this girl’s ass.
You should be fighting the terrorists in Pakistan than checking out this girl’s ass.
You should be giving nuclear power to Indian rather than checking out this girl’s ass.
You should be hardening your outsourcing policies rather than going soft seeing this girl’s ass.
Obama, these dirty thoughts will ruin you. As a role model, you should behave better.
..And so on
“
Obama is such an animal that I will ensure he never gets a job in the Indian BPO industry after he retires.
(Sudhir was so angry that he slammed the phone on me. Phew, it is so hard sometimes to talk to someone who has such an innocent, simple view of life)
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